Mormor

[akirlu]

carbonel is asking for stories about people's grandmothers. Hers will be gone soon, and she wants to write her a letter. Here is what I wrote:

My maternal grandmother is probably the most deeply set anchor of my life. There have been times when life has been shitty enough for me that what got me through was the bedrock conviction of her love. On the day I was born, my grandmother used to tell me, she walked through the house singing a little song for me and crying tears of happiness. When my mother was all set to give me up for adoption (she was unwed at the time) my grandmother bullied her into keeping me (though, in fact, my aunt takes credit for this too) - possibly the only time you'll hear of anyone threatening to throw their daughter out of the house if she didn't keep the baby. My first years were spent in my grandparents house, or with my sitter next door and afternoons with my grandmother before mom came to pick me up after work. Between my grandparents, my mother, my aunt, and my great grandparents, I had to have been the most loved and wanted baby on the planet. And the holdover I have from that time is a very secure center-place, where I am the most cherished and delightful creature imaginable. That holds me upright when I might otherwise be crushed.