Posting Tokens
Jul. 27th, 2012 05:35 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
akirluTo be redeemed for actual posts at a later time.
Yesterday morning, as I was waking up and trying to talk myself into some level of enthusiasm for getting to work on time, it struck me forcibly that I have an internal script that does a lot of damage to my life. It goes, "I am a disappointment." I have quite a lot more to say on that, stuff about mothers and daughters and the life my Mom forewent when she decided on (or was bullied into -- hard to say there) keeping me, about life expectations, personal successes, and the internal scripts that, as much as luck and a support network, go into making them. But I have to marshal my thoughts a bit to make that coherent. In the meantime, it was also interesting to discover that if I deliberately overwrite "I am a disappointment," with "You are a sad disappointment to your mother," it pokes a right proper hole in the former, and I can mock it, and make it small. And that seems like a good thing to do. Anyway, more on that later, after I have a bit of a think.
On a lighter note, I was pleased to discover that there's a local rock trio who specialize in music for kids called Recess Monkey.
Also, have a picture of a cat:
I'm especially pleased with that one for a number of reasons, not least because it is a good likeness of Tinka, who is usually nearly impossible to photograph well by dint of being (nominally) black, and also because something about it inexplicably reminds me ofRenoir's Manet's "Bar at the Folies Bergere".
Yesterday morning, as I was waking up and trying to talk myself into some level of enthusiasm for getting to work on time, it struck me forcibly that I have an internal script that does a lot of damage to my life. It goes, "I am a disappointment." I have quite a lot more to say on that, stuff about mothers and daughters and the life my Mom forewent when she decided on (or was bullied into -- hard to say there) keeping me, about life expectations, personal successes, and the internal scripts that, as much as luck and a support network, go into making them. But I have to marshal my thoughts a bit to make that coherent. In the meantime, it was also interesting to discover that if I deliberately overwrite "I am a disappointment," with "You are a sad disappointment to your mother," it pokes a right proper hole in the former, and I can mock it, and make it small. And that seems like a good thing to do. Anyway, more on that later, after I have a bit of a think.
On a lighter note, I was pleased to discover that there's a local rock trio who specialize in music for kids called Recess Monkey.
Also, have a picture of a cat:
I'm especially pleased with that one for a number of reasons, not least because it is a good likeness of Tinka, who is usually nearly impossible to photograph well by dint of being (nominally) black, and also because something about it inexplicably reminds me of
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